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Spiritual Disciplines for the Soul: Spiritual Direction (Part of the curriculum for the "Christ's Ambassadors Spiritual Formation Group" intended to teach those receiving spiritual guidance the basics of offering it to others.) William Gaultiere, Ph.D., © 2006 “‘Do you understand what you are reading?’ …‘How can I unless someone guides me?’” The Ethiopian’s response to Philip (Acts 8:30-31) Longing for God is the breath of the soul. We yearn for God’s presence. Together, as Christ’s Ambassadors, we’ve realized this and we’ve helped one another to praise God with David, “Your love is better than life!” (Psalm 63:3). We’re learning to fix our eyes on Jesus (Hebrews 12:2) and to “keep in step with the Spirit” (Galatians 5:25). And when we get distracted or discouraged we lift up and pray for one another to help us re-engage with our Lord. Many Christians have never given serious thought to set the Lord always before their minds (Psalm 16:8). They live their lives as if they’re groping in the dark and can’t see God with them guiding them (Acts 17:27-28). They haven’t understood practicing the presence of God as a possibility for them; they haven’t trained themselves to live this way. They don’t know how desperately they need God’s presence; they don’t know what they’re missing! You and I need to tell them! More than that we need to show them. We’ve had our hearts and minds aroused by God’s beauty. We’ve discovered that there is nothing more delightful to our souls than being immersed in the loving community of Father, Son, and Spirit. The way that we can help other people to awaken to God’s presence and become attuned to the Spirit is by having spiritual conversations. For centuries this has been referred to as the ministry of giving “spiritual direction.” De-mystifying Spiritual DirectionI wonder what you think of when you hear the term “spiritual direction”? I’m afraid you might think of it as a rather obscure and formal professional practice for priests, monks, nuns, and serious Catholics. Maybe you imagine the people involved in this to be dressed in dark cloaks, to have long faces, and to be looking down with hands folded as they shuffle along quietly with a somber director giving instructions as the directee quietly listens. Or perhaps you see them bent over a desk with their face buried in a huge Bible as they carry out an assignment form their director. This is not the case at all. Spiritual direction is simply a ministry of using spiritual conversations to mentor someone in their relationship with God so that they draw closer to him. Consider some of the wonderful metaphors that the Scriptures offer us for what spiritual mentors do for others – they’re like:
Some spiritual directors have received professional theological training in using conversation and prayer to help people draw closer to God and his purposes, but most have not. Most of the mentors that God uses to be salty for him in the lives of others are amateurs – people without seminary degrees, people just like you and I. “Amateur” comes from the Latin word “amator,” which means “lover.” Amateurs do an activity out of love, not as a job for pay, doing their work out of passion, not because it’s their profession. Spiritual directors are true amateurs: they’re either unpaid or modestly reimbursed, they don’t have formal credentials or if they do they still don’t think of themselves as experts, and they do what they do because they enjoy sharing with others what they’ve experienced in their own journey. The ministry of spiritual guidance is for all Christians. How could we think otherwise? Remember all the biblical exhortations for Christians to minister to “one another”? We’re to “urge one another to good works,” “speak the truth in love,” “confess to one another,” “pray for one another.” Who is incapable of learning to minister to others in these ways? No one! Every Christ-follower can and should grow into the role of being a soul guide for others. In fact, I believe that each us, if we’re to live as Christ’s Ambassadors, needs to have three kinds of spiritual relationships: mentors to learn from, friends to share with, and people to guide. For instance, the Apostle Paul was trained by Gamaliel and Ananias, shared spiritual companionship with fellow disciples like Peter and Barnabas, and mentored many others including Timothy and Titus. A Brief History of Spiritual DirectionSpiritual direction has a long history. Throughout biblical history we see that God-fearing men and women grew spiritually through being apprenticed to a spiritual mentor who helped them rely on God and grow closer to him. Ruth had Naomi, Moses had his father-in-law Jethro, David had Nathan, Esther had her uncle Mordecai, Elisha had Elijah, Timothy had his mother Eunice and then the Apostle Paul, and so on. Anderson and Reese write: Early in the life of the church, the work of spiritual direction was taken seriously and carefully developed. Before there were programs for Sunday school, Christian education, catechism classes or Bible study, there was a practice of mentoring in which the great cloud of witness handed on to the next generation the truth and power of the life of faith (Spiritual Mentoring, p. 24). This intentional relational process of “handing on” what was “received from the Lord” continued in the early church through a spiritual lineage that passed from the apostles to the bishops, with the Apostle John personally discipling Polycarp, the second century Bishop of Smyrna. The monastic movement founded by Abba Anthony and the other Desert Fathers in the fourth century and strengthened by Benedict and his Rule in the sixth century continued this tradition of growing through receiving the ministry of spiritual direction. Then in 1216 Dominic began the Dominican order of itinerant friars, with layman traveling from village to village to teach Christian doctrine and care for souls. Ignatius of Loyola (1491-1556; founded the Jesuit Order) formalized the practice of spiritual direction with The Spiritual Exercises, a manual for spiritual directors that has been used especially by other Roman Catholics. Many others came along and developed further the practice of spiritual direction: Bernard of Clairvaux (1090-1153; founder of the Cisetercian Order, Aelred of Rievaulx (1109-1166), Catherine of Siena (1347-1380), John of the Cross (1542 –1591) and Teresa of Avila (1515-1582; founded the Carmelite Order), Jean Grou (1731-1803), and many others. In recent years Evangelical Christians have been embracing the practice of spiritual direction, but in reality it’s been there all along. Martin Luther (1483-1546), John Calvin (1509-1564; was referred to as a “director of souls”), numerous Puritan divines, John Wesley (1703-1791), and many other Protestant leaders have practiced a ministry of spiritual direction, even though they may not have used that term. Larry Crabb, a popular author and Christian psychologist turned spiritual director says that the standard evangelical means of spiritual growth – moral vigilance, church attendance, and busyness in a variety of programs, conferences, methods, and ministries – isn’t producing mature disciples of Jesus. Is something more needed? Mostly, it’s less that is needed! Less activity! Less striving! Instead we need to focus on intentional spiritual conversations with friends and guides to encourage one another in the way of prayer and the practice of the spiritual disciplines in our daily lives. Defining “Spiritual Direction”Recall that in our earlier discussion of spiritual friendship we considered the importance of having conversations with “deep-spirited friends” who help us to grow closer to God and to live out his purposes for our lives. David Benner, in his book Sacred Companions, sets spiritual direction alongside spiritual friendship as similar practices for helping people grow spiritually. He explains that the main difference between the two is that the focus of spiritual direction is one of mentoring rather than mutuality, as in the case of spiritual friendship. Although, he indicates that spiritual partners can take turns giving one another spiritual direction. To help us to understand better what we’re talking about let’s look at some relatively recent definitions of spiritual direction from people who have spent years offering this form of soul care to others:
Spiritual direction is a form of soul care, a spiritual discipline to “keep your soul diligently” (Deuteronomy 4:9b, NASB). The soul guide is a fellow Christian journeying with Jesus to become more like him, perhaps more mature than the one seeking guidance, and pointing to the Holy Spirit, the real Spiritual Director. In the conversation that ensues the mentor keeps the focus on how the seeker is experiencing God and facilitates for the seeker a growing intimacy with God. This increased closeness with God is gained through becoming more aware of God’s active and gracious presence in the particulars of actual, daily life in all its ordinariness. So in spiritual direction the conversation between director and directee is really a conversation of three, a “prayer process” that centers on responding to God’s presence and his kingdom purposes, growing in his grace for ourselves and sharing it with others as well. Prayerful conversation with a mentor is the like the dawning of a new day – it awakens our souls to God (Psalm 57:8), to “taste and see that the Lord is good” (Psalm 34:8a, NIV), to find our delight in him (Psalm 37:4), to seek him in all things because he is in all things. I’ve come to think of the ministry of spiritual direction as mentoring another, soul-to-soul, in the three great life purposes for all Christ-followers: worship, growth, and service. We have prayerful, Spirit-led conversations that focus us on admiring God in Scripture and life, being spiritually formed to more like Jesus deep in our souls, and learning to love others as God has loved us. This spiritual guidance can be done by trained ministry professionals or maturing Christ-followers, one-on-one or in groups, in formal meetings or in spontaneous conversations, from a director to a directee or exchanged back and forth between friends. Whatever the context we work together in prayer and conversation “until Christ is formed in you” (Galatians 4:19b, NIV). It helps us to understand spiritual direction to differentiate it from other modes of giving spiritual help and soul care. It’s different than teaching in that it’s more intimate and personal than typical lesson-giving. It’s different than counseling in that the focus is on improving relationship with God rather than overcoming psychological problems. And it’s different than discipleship, as the term has come to be used, because it’s more of a personal and relational process than a content-driven course on the early steps of the Christian journey. My intention with our Christ’s Ambassadors group has been for it to be an advanced discipleship group in terms of the content we study before our meetings and a spiritual direction group in terms of the process we share together when we meet and share with one another. I understand this to be soul-full discipling or spiritual mentoring as Jesus practiced with his followers. An Experience in Offering Spiritual Direction One time I was asked by Howard Baker to help him lead a spiritual formation retreat in Colorado Springs for twenty Christian leaders. My contribution was to facilitate some times of spiritual conversation over the weekend. I was a little nervous about this at first since I didn’t know most of the people and hadn’t led many retreats at that time. As I prayed in preparation for the retreat the Lord directed me to a passage of Scripture and put it in a beautiful new light for me:
All at once, like a sudden burst of bright sunshine on a cloudy day, God showed me that to be a spiritual director is to be a “friend of the Bridegroom!” I had never heard this analogy anywhere before – it was a special word from the Lord for me. The Lord showed me that on the retreat when I helped people to share about their experiences I was to stand at Jesus’ side and welcome his bride as she walked down the aisle to him. All the while I was to keep my ear on the Bridegroom and my eyes on his glorious bride. I was to help his bride to rejoice with me in hearing and responding to the Bridegroom’s voice, celebrating her union with her Bridegroom. I didn’t need to be anxious because it wasn’t about me and my performance – it was about Jesus! Jesus is to become greater and I’m to become lesser. My role was simply to attend to the bride’s relationship with Jesus (just as my relationship with Jesus has been supported by others) so that she admires Jesus as she walks down the aisle of life, listening for him, drawing close to him, and waiting for his glory to be unveiled in her as he kisses her. This wedding is meant to display to everyone the greatness of the Bridegroom and his love for his bride. Another thing that God showed me, which gave me great peace and comfort, was that before I stand next to him as the friend of the Bridegroom to facilitate his relationship with his bride he wanted me to walk down the aisle as his bride! He wanted me to rejoice in loving and being loved by him and then to let the help I give others be an expression of my union with him. For me there’s no greater joy than this! I’m privileged to guide others into the intimate love of Jesus that I’m growing into and to see this love overflow from those I help to other people who also grow closer to Jesus! Spiritual Disciplines:
Meditations: Offering Spiritual Direction SPIRITUAL DIRECTION HELPS PEOPLE TO… Love God (worship), self (growth), and others (serve) with their whole self“‘The most important [commandment],’ answered Jesus, ‘is this: “Hear, O Israel, the Lord our God, the Lord is one. Love the Lord your God with all your heart [passion] and with all your soul [prayer] and with all your mind [intelligence] and with all your strength [energy].” The second is this: “Love your neighbor as yourself.” There is no commandment greater than these’” (Mark 12:29-31, NIV; words in brackets are from MSG). Come into God’s life by interacting with him to know him intimately“Now this is eternal life: that they may know you, the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom you have sent” (John 17:3, NIV). Experience the goodness of God “Taste and see that the LORD is good… Delight yourself in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart” (Psalm 34:8a, 37:4, NIV). Awaken their consciousness to divine songs and sunrises“Awake, my soul! Awake, harp and lyre! I will awaken the dawn” (Psalm 57:8, NIV). Practice diligent soul care “Keep your soul diligently” (Deuteronomy 4:9b, NASB). Pray with growing alertness to and gratefulness for God’s presence“Pray diligently. Stay alert, with your eyes wide open in gratitude” (Colossians 4:2, MSG). Make the God of Heaven the strength of their heart and the portion for their life “Whom have I in heaven but you? And earth has nothing I desire besides you. My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever” (Psalm 73:25-26, NIV). Discern truth, rely on the Spirit, continue in Christ, live with courage “But you are not like that, for the Holy Spirit has come upon you, and all of you know the truth. So I am writing to you not because you don't know the truth but because you know the difference between truth and falsehood… because you need to be aware of those who want to lead you astray. But you have received the Holy Spirit, and he lives within you, so you don't need anyone to teach you what is true. For the Spirit teaches you all things, and what he teaches is true – it is not a lie. So continue in what he has taught you, and continue to live in Christ. And now, dear children, continue to live in fellowship with Christ so that when he returns, you will be full of courage and not shrink back from him in shame”(1 John 2:20-21, 26b-28 NLT). Grope in the dark to find God up close and come to life in being with him “They should seek the Lord, in the hope that they might grope for Him and find Him, though He is not far from each one of us; for in Him we live and move and have our being” (Acts 17:27-28a, NKJV). Answer the question, “Where do you sense the Lord?”“The priests did not ask, ‘Where is the LORD?’” (Jeremiah 2:8a, NIV). SPIRIUTAL DIRECTORS ARE LIKE…Farmers who work with God to grow souls in God’s field“I planted the seed, Apollos watered it, but God made it grow. So neither he who plants nor he who waters is anything, but only God, who makes things grow… For we are God's fellow workers; you are God's field, God's building” (1 Corinthians 3:6-7, 9, NIV). Lights that search others’ thoughts and desires, guiding them into God’s life“O LORD, you have searched me and you know me… Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting” (Psalm 139:1, 23-24, NIV). Salt that makes people thirsty for God and brings out God-flavors in their lives “You are the salt of the earth… Let me tell you why you are here. You're here to be salt-seasoning that brings out the God-flavors of this earth. If you lose your saltiness, how will people taste godliness?” (Matthew 5:13, NIV and MSG). Mothers laboring for a child to birthed and formed in Christ“My dear children, for whom I am again in the pains of childbirth until Christ is formed in you” (Galatians 4:19, NIV). Doorkeepers who usher people into God’s presence“Better is one day in your courts than a thousand elsewhere; I would rather be a doorkeeper in the house of my God than dwell in the tents of the wicked” (Psalm 84:10, NIV). Hosts who offer God’s grace via spiritual hospitality with prayers and love “Be clear minded and self-controlled so that you can pray. Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins. Offer hospitality to one another without grumbling. Each one should use whatever gift he has received to serve others, faithfully administering God's grace in its various forms” (1 Peter 4:7b-10, NIV). Friends of the Bridegroom who invite Christ’s bride to rejoice in marrying him “The bride belongs to the bridegroom. The friend who attends the bridegroom waits and listens for him, and is full of joy when he hears the bridegroom's voice. That joy is mine, and it is now complete. He must become greater; I must become less” (John 3:29-30, NIV). Shepherds overseeing the spiritual growth of the Chief Shepherd’s sheep“Be shepherds of God's flock that is under your care, serving as overseers – not because you must, but because you are willing, as God wants you to be; not greedy for money, but eager to serve; not lording it over those entrusted to you, but being examples to the flock. And when the Chief Shepherd appears, you will receive the crown of glory that will never fade away” (1 Peter 5:2-4, NIV). Ministers who give spiritual blessings to encourage other’s growth“I long to visit you so I can share a spiritual blessing with you that will help you grow strong in the Lord. I'm eager to encourage you in your faith, but I also want to be encouraged by yours. In this way, each of us will be a blessing to the other” (Romans 1:11-12, NLT). Apprentices who gather people around Jesus and are refreshed “The apostles gathered around Jesus and reported to him all they had done and taught. Then, because so many people were coming and going that they did not even have a chance to eat, he said to them, ‘Come with me by yourselves to a quiet place and get some rest. So they went away by themselves in a boat to a solitary place’” (Mark 6:30-32, NIV).
EXAMPLES OF SPIRITUAL DIRECTION IN THE BIBLE… Philip used the texts of Scripture and life to guide the eunuch into Jesus’ joy“Now an angel of the Lord said to Philip, ‘Go south to the road – the desert road – that goes down from Jerusalem to Gaza.’ So he started out, and on his way he met an Ethiopian eunuch, an important official in charge of all the treasury of Candace, queen of the Ethiopians. This man had gone to Jerusalem to worship, and on his way home was sitting in his chariot reading the book of Isaiah the prophet. The Spirit told Philip, ‘Go to that chariot and stay near it.’ “Then Philip ran up to the chariot and heard the man reading Isaiah the prophet. ‘Do you understand what you are reading?’ Philip asked. “‘How can I,’ he said, ‘unless someone explains it to me?’ So he invited Philip to come up and sit with him. The eunuch was reading this passage of Scripture: ‘He was led like a sheep to the slaughter, and as a lamb before the shearer is silent, so he did not open his mouth. In his humiliation he was deprived of justice. Who can speak of his descendants? For his life was taken from the earth.’ “The eunuch asked Philip, ‘Tell me, please, who is the prophet talking about, himself or someone else?’ Then Philip began with that very passage of Scripture and told him the good news about Jesus. “As they traveled along the road, they came to some water and the eunuch said, ‘Look, here is water. Why shouldn't I be baptized?’ And he gave orders to stop the chariot. Then both Philip and the eunuch went down into the water and Philip baptized him. “When they came up out of the water, the Spirit of the Lord suddenly took Philip away, and the eunuch did not see him again, but went on his way rejoicing” (Acts 8:26-39, NIV). Jesus shows woman her deep well, she drinks his living water until she overflows“Now [Jesus] had to go through Samaria. So he came to a town in Samaria called Sychar, near the plot of ground Jacob had given to his son Joseph. Jacob's well was there, and Jesus, tired as he was from the journey, sat down by the well. It was about the sixth hour. “When a Samaritan woman came to draw water, Jesus said to her, ‘Will you give me a drink?’ (His disciples had gone into the town to buy food.) “The Samaritan woman said to him, ‘You are a Jew and I am a Samaritan woman. How can you ask me for a drink?’ (For Jews do not associate with Samaritans.) “Jesus answered her, ‘If you knew the gift of God and who it is that asks you for a drink, you would have asked him and he would have given you living water.’ “‘Sir,’ the woman said, ‘you have nothing to draw with and the well is deep. Where can you get this living water? Are you greater than our father Jacob, who gave us the well and drank from it himself, as did also his sons and his flocks and herds?’ “Jesus answered, ‘Everyone who drinks this water will be thirsty again, but whoever drinks the water I give him will never thirst. Indeed, the water I give him will become in him a spring of water welling up to eternal life.’ “The woman said to him, ‘Sir, give me this water so that I won't get thirsty and have to keep coming here to draw water.’ “He told her, ‘Go, call your husband and come back.’ “’I have no husband,’ she replied. “Jesus said to her, ‘You are right when you say you have no husband. The fact is, you have had five husbands, and the man you now have is not your husband. What you have just said is quite true.’ “‘Sir,’ the woman said, ‘I can see that you are a prophet. Our fathers worshiped on this mountain, but you Jews claim that the place where we must worship is in Jerusalem.’ “Jesus declared, ‘Believe me, woman, a time is coming when you will worship the Father neither on this mountain nor in Jerusalem. You Samaritans worship what you do not know; we worship what we do know, for salvation is from the Jews. Yet a time is coming and has now come when the true worshipers will worship the Father in spirit and truth, for they are the kind of worshipers the Father seeks. God is spirit, and his worshipers must worship in spirit and in truth.’ “The woman said, ‘I know that Messiah’ (called Christ) ‘is coming. When he comes, he will explain everything to us.’ “Then Jesus declared, ‘I who speak to you am he.’ “…Then, leaving her water jar, the woman went back to the town and said to the people, ‘Come, see a man who told me everything I ever did. Could this be the Christ?’ They came out of the town and made their way toward him… “Many of the Samaritans from that town believed in him because of the woman's testimony, ‘He told me everything I ever did.’ So when the Samaritans came to him, they urged him to stay with them, and he stayed two days. And because of his words many more became believers. “They said to the woman, ‘We no longer believe just because of what you said; now we have heard for ourselves, and we know that this man really is the Savior of the world’” (John 4:4-26, 28-30, 39-42, NIV).
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